Click on Recovery Walk for more information on this event and comments by participants

Article by Lauren Adams, WPSDLocal6 News, Paducah, KY

Rev. Sloan

Families and friends who love someone addicted to alcohol or other drugs have experienced emotional pain that only another who has been in the same place can understand. One who has never experienced loving and being loved by an addict might say, “Why don’t you just leave them?” But would this be a valid solution if the afflicted person had cancer or diabetes? No, of course not.

Families and friends can help by:

• Attending workshops on addiction
• Going to open AA or NA meetings and learning firsthand from folks who have lived through the grip of addiction
• Becoming a member of an Al-Anon family group.

Family members can play an integral part in the addict’s full recovery, but only if they are willing to work as hard at being a part of the solution as they have worked at being part of the problem. This not meant to be a criticism, only a statement of truth.

Everyone is reluctant to change what’s familiar. It is like having an old favorite pair of bedroom slippers. Though worn and ugly, they are comfortable and one is used to them. If one gets a new pair, will they feel the same … will there be a period of adjustment…will one miss wearing the old ones?

If you grew up in an alcoholic family, more likely than not you married an alcoholic. Somewhere in the back of your mind you found yourself doing the same things you promised yourself you would never do. Adult children of alcoholics find themselves married to someone they thought they could change or control.

Following are some characteristics of a person brought up in an alcoholic home:**

• Hero–the well-adjusted child in the family who has it all together. They get good grades, are the star of the football team, and strive for perfection as validation. They need to be in control, but everything in their lives is out of control.
• Scapegoat–the child who gets into trouble. He or she unconsciously chooses to be the “one problem” so that the other members of family will take their focus off the alcoholic/addict.
• Lost Child–the “good one” who never does anything wrong to the extent of being lost in the shuffle. They grow up and typically marry someone they can take care of and/or fix.
• Mascot–the child who makes the family laugh. They bring relief to the situation by putting on a comic mask to ease the emotional pain in the household.
• Chief Enabler–usually the spouse who tries everything to “keep the secret.” They try to keep the family intact while it is falling apart. The only sense of relief the enabler might get is a brief period of sobriety the addict might demonstrate in response to a threat from that spouse. As the disease progresses, the enabler might feel a bit like a juggler with too many balls in the air. Eventually, this family member gets “sick and tried of being sick and tired” and either leaves and/or goes into recovery.

The importance of family members’ involvement in their own recovery cannot be overstressed. The family can and does make a difference in getting someone into a program of recovery. Just by becoming a member of Al-Anon, the family member learns: they didn’t cause it, they can’t control it, and they can’t cure it. The Three Cs of Al-Anon (also adopted by Alateen) provide relief and freedom to many people.

Freedom from depending on someone to provide our happiness is the start of the road to recovery. All kinds of miracles can happen when we decide we have had enough. It is time to quit playing to blame game and begin a journey toward freedom.

Pray this prayer with me:

God grant me the SERENITY to accept the things I can not change
COURAGE to change the things I can;
And the WISDOM to know the difference.

*From a letter to the clearinghouse for the Al-Anon family groups, which are an outgrowth of AA; 1990, Understanding and Counseling the Alcoholic by Howard Clinebell.

**From Counseling the Chemically Dependent by Rickey L. George.

Originally published by SPSARV & the United Methodist General Board of Global Ministries. Permission granted to reprint. 

Rev. Cynthia Sloan serves as program associate for the United Methodist Special Program on Substance Abuse and Related Violence (SPSARV), where she coordinates the delivery of training and resources for clergy and congregational ministry development. An ordained deacon of the Western North Carolina Conference, Rev. Sloan is a licensed clinical addictions specialist in the state of North Carolina.

The General Board of Church and Society of the United Methodist Church, the nation’s third-largest denomination, has endorsed the Faith Partners Team model for local congregations to help solve America’s number one health problem – alcohol and other drug addiction.

James Winkler, General Secretary of the General Board of Church and Society of the United Methodist Church, said in a support letter sent to all Bishops and Church and Society Chairpersons in the U.S. Annual Conferences, “I believe that the team approach for congregations is an effective and sustainable way to provide prevention, education, early intervention and recovery support.” Winkler said the General Board of Church and Society of the United Methodist Church is encouraging all members to promote attendance at Faith Partners Team Leadership Training Events offered by Faith Partners Inc.

General Board of Global Ministries Partners to Bring Training to Five Jurisdictions

At the request of its Inter-Agency and Standing Committee Task Force, the Special Program on Substance Abuse and Related Violence (SPSARV), a general church initiative housed at the General Board of Global Ministries of the United Methodist Church has partnered with Faith Partners Inc to offer its series of Faith Partners trainings. In 2007-2008, SPSARV offered the training to each of the five United Methodist jurisdictions. A leadership team composed of United Methodist clergy and lay people met in Nashville with the General Board and Faith Partners staff to work together toward this historic denominational partnering to make resources available across the country.

The leadership team explored the church’s role from a theological perspective, examined the Faith Partners approach, identified ways to make the church more aware of the need for this ministry and provided guidance on how to initiate the Faith Partners model across the denomination.

For more information on the SPSARV-sponsored Faith Partner trainings, go to www.umsparv.org.

The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA), Center for Substance Abuse Treatment (CSAT), has unveiled materials for the 20th Anniversary Celebration of National Alcohol and Drug Addiction Recovery Month (Recovery Month) at a news briefing that highlighted plans for this September’s observance.

The 2009 Recovery Month theme is “Join the Voices for Recovery: Together We Learn, Together We Heal.” The 2009 public service announcements (PSAs) have two supporting story lines aimed at directing people to SAMHSA/CSAT’s 24-hour information and treatment referral helpline, 1-800-662-HELP. The PSAs depict scenes of individuals whose daily struggles due to alcohol or drugs can regain their lives through addiction treatment. The PSAs were produced for Radio and TV in both Spanish and English.

Additional materials include a Recovery Month kit, posters, and other collateral materials.

The Recovery Month observance highlights the societal benefits of substance abuse treatment, lauds the contributions of treatment providers and promotes the message that recovery from substance abuse in all its forms is possible. The observance also encourages citizens to take action to help expand and improve the availability of effective substance abuse treatment for those in need. Each year a new theme, or emphasis, is selected for the observance.

Recovery Month provides a platform to celebrate people in recovery and those who serve them. Each September, thousands of treatment programs around the country celebrate their successes and share them with their neighbors, friends, and colleagues in an effort to educate the public about treatment, how it works, for whom, and why. Substance abuse treatment providers have made significant accomplishments, having transformed the lives of untold thousands of Americans. These successes often go unnoticed by the broader population; therefore, Recovery Month provides a vehicle to celebrate these successes.

Recovery Month also serves to educate the public on substance abuse as a national health crisis, that addiction is a treatable disease, and that recovery is possible. Recovery Month highlights the benefits of treatment for not only the affected individual, but for their family, friends, workplace, and society as a whole. Educating the public reduces the stigma associated with addiction and treatment. Accurate knowledge of the disease helps people to understand the importance of supporting treatment programs, those who work within the treatment field, and those in need of treatment.

More Recovery Month information available here.

The Presbyterians for Addiction Action leadership committee of the PHEWA has endorsed Faith Partners. It is a model of ministry that is sorely needed in congregations. Its special strength is voluntarism matched with pastoral support.

The team mission is the following: “The ‘House of Hope Faith Partners Ministry will serve the needs of our congregation, and the broader community, by addressing addiction in our midst. We will provide educational programs, resource information, outreach and support to people affected by addiction.’ Those of us in healthy recovery know that we are walking miracles. God has given us new life. The people who love and care about us give their gift of support. When a ‘church home’ offers sanctuary and healing compassion for its members, it is a church at its very best”.

Louisa United Methodist Church (Prestonsburg District) hosted the “Core Competency Training: Addiction Survival Kit for Clergy” in their new family life center on March 9-10, 2009. Forty persons from around the Kentucky Annual Conference came together to learn more about the issues surrounding substance abuse and hear first-hand accounts of the recovery process. The program was part of Prestonsburg District’s long-term commitment to addressing the problem of substance abuse in the area.

Rev. Guy Moyer, pastor of Louisa UMC, said, “The conference was exceptional. It was presented in a professional and profoundly powerful way. Rarely have I seen conference participants so engaged, energized, and honest in their dialogue concerning the challenges of addiction, the opportunities for ministry, and the hope that is in Christ to make all things new.”

The goal of the two-day seminar, led by Trish Merrill and Drew Brooks of the Austin, Texas, based Faith Partners, Inc., was to equip participants with knowledge and skills to build confidence and commitment for the initiation and support of addiction prevention and recovery ministries.

“It was one of the most helpful continuing education events that I have ever attended,” said Rev. Brad Smart of Bagby Memorial United Methodist Church in Grayson, Kentucky.  Funding for the cost-efficient seminar was provided through the clergy education monies set aside from the Pikeville Hospital settlement.

Additional information on this training event and the overall approach can be had by clicking on FP Leadership.

Check out the  Kids Rock for New Life event in Austin, TX  This is a music benefit for New Life Institute, Austin, TX. Performances and entertainment include Grammy-nominated Grupo Fantasma, drummer Hunt Sales, author Spike Gillespie, and the Paul Green School of Rock to benefit the New Life Institute Counseling Center of Austin. The event is scheduled for Thursday, November 5th,from 6:30 to 9:30 p.m. at The Mohawk, 912 Red River, in Austin. New Life’s Counseling Center of Austin is an area service provider that extends help to those who could not otherwise afford quality mental health counseling.

Tickets are $25 in advance or $30 at the door. Food, by Chef Margit, is included. Drinks are extra. An auction of intriguing, “must-have” items and opportunities will be held. For tickets contact New Life Institute at 512-469-9447 or look at the New Life website. All event proceeds fund mental health care for those in need.

New Life Institute promotes reconciliation, restoration, and renewal for those seeking healing and growth. Centered in the Austin metropolitan area, their services include counseling, mediation, education, and spiritual direction, using a multidimensional approach to emotional well being and spiritual wholeness. New Life Institute is dedicated to serving those who cannot otherwise afford quality, professional mental health services. Associated with the United Methodist Church (Austin District), New Life Institute serves people regardless of faith orientation or practice.